


A Corny Kind of Love

by FancifulFollies



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Dildos, Dirty Puns, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hand Jobs, M/M, Modern AU, Sexual Content, also, also featuring alexander's purr, at the end, but i made it explicit just in case, food shaped dildos, i dont even know y'all, it's not wild, puns, read if you dare, y'all this is the craziest thing i've written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 10:17:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11803992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FancifulFollies/pseuds/FancifulFollies
Summary: Aaron intends for it to be a joke, but Alexander, of course, wants to give it a try.Inspired bythis post





	A Corny Kind of Love

**Author's Note:**

> If you regularly eat corn, this might not be the fic for you

Aaron stretches out across the bed, hands splayed on either side of him as he lets his eyes close.

He hates hotel beds. They’re too soft, like he might sink into the mattress and never come back out. Not to mention how slippery the sheets feel. Sheets shouldn’t feel this slippery. It’s not natural.

The mattress bounces, and Aaron cracks his eyes open to see Alexander fresh from his shower kneeling on the bed, looking like a wet, excited puppy.

“I love hotel beds!”

Aaron huffs out a breath. Of course he does. “I like ours better.”

“True.” Alexander hums and flops onto his back, his towel coming half undone. “That mattress has like, molded to the shape of our bodies.” He turns his head and pokes Aaron in the side. “Hey, no pouting. We’re on vacation.”

“I’m not pouting. I’m…brooding.”

“Same thing.”

Aaron sighs and rolls onto his side, eyes tracking a drop of water that’s slipping down Alexander’s chest. He reaches out, tucking his fingers into the towel wrapped around Alexander’s waist. “How about you distract me, then?”

Alexander smirks and lifts his hips, helping Aaron unwrap the towel from around him.

Aaron wastes no time in rolling over and straddling Alexander’s hips, bending down to capture his mouth in a deep kiss. And Alexander responds enthusiastically, as he always does, throwing his arms around Aaron’s neck and pulling him closer as his lips part.

The next few minutes are a blur of kissing and hands roaming over skin, and soon Aaron finds himself in nothing but his boxers, panting as he rolls his hips down against Alexander’s, both of their dicks having taken interest in the proceedings.

“Wait, wait,” Alexander breathes out against his mouth, a hand coming up to press against Aaron’s chest. “There’s something I want to try.” He gives a mischievous smile before pushing Aaron off of him.

And Aaron watches as Alexander clambers off the bed, giving Aaron a good view of his ass when he bends down to rummage around in Aaron’s suitcase. Then he’s turning back around, climbing onto the bed with a box in his hands that makes Aaron stare at Alexander with narrowed eyes.

“You went through my stuff.”

Alexander blinks at him with an innocent expression that Aaron doesn’t buy for a second. “I needed a pair of sweatpants. But when I saw this…” Alexander waves the box. “Well, I figured there’d be no need for pants.” Alexander glances back down at the box, a smile on his face. “Now, need you to tell the story of why [you have a dildo that looks like corn](https://wigmissing.tumblr.com/post/163764699815/hey-guys) in your suitcase.”

Aaron groans. “It was supposed to be a _joke_. Thomas gave it to me, made some comment about you being willing to shove anything up your ass and then gave me this a week or so later, told me I should test out his theory.”

“How nice of him.”

“Like I said, it’s a joke.”

Alexander’s eyes flick up to his, smile widening. “And yet you still brought it with you.” He shifts, climbing onto Aaron’s lap, the box still in his hands. He leans forward until his lips are pressed up against Aaron’s ear. “I want to try it.”

Aaron shudders as Alexander’s lips start to trail down to his neck, pressing kisses to the skin there. “Are you serious?” He asks as he moves his hands to Alexander’s hips, rubbing circles there with his thumbs.

Alexander hums, grinding down against Aaron. “I’m nothing if not adventurous.” He pulls back slightly to kiss Aaron on the mouth, teeth tugging at his lower lip before he pulls back even more. “C’mon, I took a shower and everything. Please?”

Aaron slides his hands up Alexander’s back, already feeling himself give in. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Only for you,” Alexander murmurs, pressing another kiss to his lips. “C’mon, gimme a cornjob.”

Aaron tips Alexander off his lap, snorting at the surprised yelp that escapes Alexander as he lands flat on his back on the mattress. “Never say that to me again,” Aaron tells him, but he bends down to grab the bottle of lube from his suitcase. “And spread your legs.”

Alexander complies immediately, lifting his hips to allow Aaron to shove a pillow beneath him, hand coming up to stroke himself a few times as Aaron gets situated between his legs.

Aaron probably spends too much time opening Alexander up with his fingers, but it’s too good of a thing to resist. He loves having Alexander beneath him, practically purring with pleasure as Aaron crooks his fingers inside of him, hair clinging to his forehead as he arches his back. It’s a sight Aaron could look at forever.

“I’m good,” Alexander pants for what must be the third time. “Please, Aaron.” His voice is starting to waver, breath coming out in harsh bursts. “ _Please_.”

Aaron smirks, leaning down to kiss Alexander, muffling his moans as he continues to pump his fingers in and out for a few more seconds before removing them reluctantly. “Last chance to back out,” he murmurs.

Alexander’s shakes his head. “Never.” He wraps his legs around Aaron’s waist, arching again so that their erections rub up against each other, Aaron having removed his boxers somewhere in the middle of fingering Alexander.

Aaron fumbles blindly for the box, pulling away from Alexander once his fingers nudge up against it. He gets the dildo out, nose wrinkling at the unappealing appearance of it, which makes Alexander snort.

“There are weirder dildos out there, Aaron.”

“Ones that I don’t need to hear about,” Aaron says back, ignoring Alexander’s second snort. He squirts more lube onto his hand, starting to spread it over the dildo, the texture feeling strange under his palm.

Alexander watches him with dark eyes. “The description said it has unique corn particles that stimulate pleasure hot spots. But the thing I’m most interested in is how someone came up with the idea to make a corn-shaped dildo in the first place. Like...were they a lonely farmer who was out in the cornfield one day and just – “

“Alexander.” Aaron rests a hand on his thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Talk less.”

Alexander grins and tilts his chin up, fixing Aaron with a heated look. “How about you shut me up?”

Aaron slides his hand further up Alexander’s thigh, smoothing his palm over his hip and stomach before letting his fingers wrap around his dick, giving it a few firm strokes. “Gladly.” He brings the dildo up to Alexander’s hole. “Hold your legs open.”

Alexander’s hands move under his knees, lifting and spreading his legs a little more as Aaron starts to push, the tip of the dildo slipping in easily. “ _Oh._ ”

Aaron pauses at that, but Alexander murmurs a quiet ‘keep going,’ so he does, sliding more of the length into Alexander, gaze alternating between Alexander’s face and down to where the dildo is sinking into him.

“Good?” Aaron asks once the majority of it is in, smiling when Alexander just moans in response. “I can’t believe you like this.”

“Don’t kinkshame me,” Alexander breathes out, rolling his hips a little. “Or do, whatever, just keep going. Just – “ He cuts off when Aaron pulls out slightly before shoving the dildo back in, a gasp leaving him. “ _Fuck_.”

Aaron starts to move the dildo in and out more quickly, more turned on than he wants to admit at how much this is affecting Alexander. His eyes are squeezed shut, lips parted as he breathes in and out in ragged gasps.

“Beautiful,” Aaron murmurs, and Alexander laughs, the sound turning into another moan as Aaron pushes in. “What’s it feel like?”

Alexander laughs again. “There’s really no way to describe it other than it feels like having a corn cob up your ass.”

Aaron rolls his eyes. Alexander has never been good at dirty talk. But he keeps moving his hand, thrusting the dildo in and out, moving it deeper and angling it up, repeating the motion when Alexander cries out.

“Oh, holy shit.” Alexander moves his hands so one is fisted in the sheets, the other wrapping around his dick, moving it up and down quickly. “I’m gonna come.” His hips start jerking forward, a silent confirmation of his words.

Aaron speeds up his movements even more, biting at his lip and ignoring the throbbing in his own dick, focused only on getting Alexander to come. He only has to wait a few more seconds for it to happen.

Alexander arches off the mattress with a drawn out moan, body stiffening as his hand works rapidly at his dick, and then ropes of white cover his hand and stomach, moan becoming a whimper as Aaron continues to fuck into him with the dildo, making him ride out every second of his orgasm.

Then Aaron slowly eases the dildo out of him, setting it off to the side before leaning over Alexander, pressing kisses to his cheek as he comes back down, small noises still escaping him every few seconds.

“Fuck,” Alexander groans, and Aaron pulls back to see him trailing a finger through the cum on his stomach. Then Alexander starts to laugh, meeting Aaron’s eyes. “I just came on a corn shaped dildo." His grin widens. " _Creamed corn_.”

Aaron lets out a long, suffering groan. “You’ve never killed my boner so fast.”

Alexander sits up, eyes trailing down Aaron’s body. He smirks, a hand smoothing down Aaron's chest until his fingers curl around him. “You might _say_ that, but your dick is telling a different story.”

Aaron opens his mouth to say something back, but then Alexander’s hand starts to move, and he can’t focus on anything but thrusting into the tight grip around him.

Heat curls low in his stomach, and Aaron reaches out to grab at Alexander’s shoulders, needing something to hold onto as Alexander continues to jerk him off. He bends his head to press their lips together, the kiss uncoordinated and messy, but still enough to make Aaron moan into it.

Alexander runs his thumb over the head, murmuring encouraging words that Aaron can't comprehend as his skin starts to tingle. Then Alexander’s hand does something magnificent, and Aaron comes with a gasp, muffling any other noises with another kiss.

Alexander gives him a few more strokes before pulling away with a satisfied smile. “See. You’re totally turned on by the corn thing. You came so fast.”

Aaron huffs out an exasperated breath. “I’m turned on by _you_ , not the fucking corn.” He moves away to lie back on the bed, limbs feeling loose and relaxed.

“Well, you certainly pop _my_ corn,” Alexander says with a wink, laughing as he hops off the bed, avoiding Aaron's attempted slap. He stretches his arms up over his head. “Personally, I will never be able to eat corn again without getting horny.” He disappears into the bathroom for a moment, coming back with a wet washcloth, which he tosses at Aaron.

Once they’re both cleaned up, Aaron and Alexander cuddle up together on the bed, Alexander’s back pressed to Aaron’s chest, and he hums low in his throat when Aaron throws an arm around him, the noise almost seeming to vibrate, like a cat purring.

Aaron noses at Alexander’s hair, the palm of his hand resting against Alexander’s stomach. He feels it clench, and then the sound of Alexander laughing fills the air, and Aaron rolls his eyes.

“Are you thinking about creamed corn again?”

“Yes,” Alexander answers over a chuckle. “You have to admit it was a good pun.”

“No, I don’t. And I _won’t_.”

Aaron shuffles a little closer, leg slipping between Alexander’s in an attempt to get more comfortable. Then a thought pops into his mind, and he feels laughter start to bubble up in his throat until it’s escaping him seconds later.

Alexander twists in his arms so he’s facing Aaron. “What?” His eyes roam over Aaron’s face when he continues to laugh, and then he smiles. “You just thought of a dirty pun, didn’t you?” He pokes Aaron’s chest. “Spill it.”

Aaron bites his lip, trying and failing to fight back his laughter. “Corn on the cock.”

Alexander’s eyes widen, but then he’s laughing, the noise bursting from him. “ _Aaron_ , I'm scandalized! Oh! Wait, wait.” He holds up his hands, eyes bright. “Cock on the cob.”

Aaron snorts, and then they’re both dissolving into giggles, Alexander burying his face against Aaron’s chest as his shoulders shake.

They laugh so loudly for so long that they actually get a noise complaint, which of course just makes them laugh harder, tears spilling down Aaron’s face when Alexander starts looking up other food-shaped dildos like bananas and cucumbers, the comments being some of the most hilarious things he's read in years. 

Eventually, their laughter dies down to the occasional chuckle, and Aaron finds himself still smiling long after Alexander dozes off wrapped around him, soft snores escaping him every now and then. Aaron presses a gentle kiss to Alexander's forehead, one last laugh leaving him before his own eyes slip shut.

Alexander never fails to surprise him. 

**Author's Note:**

> John made me do it.
> 
> (also most of the puns were from the comments on the tumblr post, I only thought of two)


End file.
